Work is stressful these days. I feel overwhelmed a lot, but I love those kids more than they could imagine. They sometimes make me feel like I have a reason for living. I don't want to type more about my job, but there are always plenty of stories from the kids.
I'm isolating myself a lot. I stay busy with work, so quiet time is nice. This is all lame. I'm not writing much of substance.
At work, we had a discussion about Eminem, and I went on this passionate rant about how much I enjoy the way he plays with words. Everyone was surprised that I like Eminem so much when I am the "liberal feminist crazy" in a small town school. I will say that I can understand why people are confused about me being both a feminist and Eminem fan. It's very complex to explain. I would actually like to write an essay and use quotes from his songs. He certainly uses hateful words and is degrading to women, but if you listen to all of his songs, and not just one out of context of the album, you will see that he is passionate, self-reflecting, depressed, funny, lonely, and sensitive. He is one of the only rappers I know who openly admits about crying in so many of his songs. He also says these hateful things about his wife, but then openly admits his hypocrisy in a song, "When I'm Gone"-- He talks about how he is ignoring his daughter to write songs where he then says that he loves her so much and talks about how he causes her pain by rapping about hurting her mother who is a "spitting image" of her.
I understand people are worried about Eminem's hateful songs. Hate is horribly scary. I understand the power of words. It terrifies me to think that people listen to Eminem's songs and take them literally or try to mimic them. He does encourage homophobic, misogynistic thinking on the surface. It is kind of like racy comedians like Sarah Silverman. If you understand their image/act, it's great entertainment, but there is the risk that some ignorant people will quote what they say in a literal sense. In the song Eminem did over the old AeroSmith "Sing for the Moment" song, he says, "If my music is literal, then I'm a criminal, how the F*** could I raise a little girl? I couldn't. I wouldn't be fit to..."
I know some people who are on the other end and talk about his genius. I think he is brilliant with words and rhythm, but he is not trained as a writer, and it shows. Sure, he has cliches and inappropriate usage of swearing, but if you can get past that, he plays with words, rhythms, letter sounds, and content better than many poets. On the way to work, I try to keep up with Eminem rapping on some of my favorite tracks. It is incredibly hard; I am really proud that I can keep up while he raps a couple of first verses in songs.
I realize most people will not take this seriously, but when I get my CD burner fixed, I will gladly burn people an Eminem mix with an annotated list of songs, explaining what lyrics to pay attention to, which allusion is which, and maybe you will not write him off as another celebrity with no talent. I know too many activists who write him off too fast. Respecting his passion and talent can lead to reaching groups of people with ideas about love and respect that might not otherwise listen. I am very tired because my meds are kicking in. I hope this makes sense, I'm not rereading it. I'm going to bed. ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZzzZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZzzzzzz
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